Concerned About Your Child?

PASS

2 days ago

3 min read

A Parent & Caregiver Guide to Recognizing When Your Child May Need Support

Being a parent or caregiver means getting to know your child's personality, routines, strengths, and challenges. So when something feels different, you may be the first person to notice.

You may find yourself wondering: Is this just part of growing up, or should I be concerned?

There is no simple checklist that can answer that question for every child. Children and teens naturally experience changes in mood, behavior, friendships, sleep, and interests as they grow. However, when changes are persistent, significant, out of character, or begin interfering with everyday life, they may be signs that a young person is struggling and could benefit from additional support.

Trust What You Know About Your Child

You don't need to be a mental health professional to recognize that something has changed.

Parents and caregivers often know what is typical for their child. A normally outgoing child who suddenly stops seeing friends, a student who begins struggling academically without an obvious explanation, or a teen who seems persistently sad or irritable may be showing signs that something is going on beneath the surface.

The American Academy of Pediatrics recommends paying attention to changes in areas such as sleep, eating, school performance, relationships, interests, and behavior. One sign by itself does not necessarily mean a child has a mental health condition. What matters is the pattern, duration, severity, and impact on the child's daily life.

Look Beyond "Just a Phase"

Adolescence comes with plenty of changes. Wanting more independence, having occasional mood swings, becoming more private, or disagreeing with parents can all be normal parts of development.

It may be time to take a closer look when:

Changes continue for weeks or longer.
Your child's behavior is significantly different from their usual personality.
Changes interfere with school, friendships, family life, or activities they normally enjoy.
Your child seems unable to cope with everyday responsibilities or emotions.
You are seeing several concerning changes at the same time.
Your child is engaging in self-harm, substance use, or other unsafe behaviors.
Your child talks about death, suicide, hopelessness, or feeling like a burden.

NIMH recommends seeking professional guidance when concerning emotions or behaviors persist, cause significant distress, or interfere with functioning at home, school, or with friends. If a child is behaving unsafely or talks about wanting to hurt themselves or someone else, help should be sought immediately.

You Don't Have to Figure It Out Alone

One of the most important things a parent can do is reach out rather than wait until things become a crisis.

Consider starting with someone who already knows your child, such as:

Your child's pediatrician or family doctor
A school counselor, school navigator, or other trusted school professional
A mental health professional
A community behavioral health provider
Another trusted adult who has a positive relationship with your child

A pediatrician or family doctor can help determine whether your concerns may be related to a mental health condition or another issue and can help connect your family with appropriate support.

Start With a Conversation

You don't need to diagnose your child or have all the answers before you talk with them.

You can simply say:

"I've noticed you haven't seemed like yourself lately. How are things going?"

Or:

"I care about you, and I've noticed you've been having a hard time. I'd like to understand what you're going through."

Then listen.

Your first conversation doesn't have to solve the problem. Sometimes the most important first step is letting your child know that you have noticed, you care, and you are available.

When You Are Worried, Don't Wait

If your child talks about suicide, wanting to die, or hurting themselves—or you believe they may be in immediate danger—take the concern seriously and seek help right away.

Call or text 988 for the 988 Suicide & Crisis Lifeline. If there is an immediate, life-threatening emergency, call 911 or go to the nearest emergency department.

Remember

You don't have to know exactly what is wrong to know that something isn't right.

Your concern, your willingness to listen, and your decision to reach out can be important first steps in helping your child get the support they need.